


midnight interlude

by drowninginmyworries



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Drabble, F/M, Introspection, Pregnancy, This is just me dealing with some things, brief mentions of violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:19:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23426131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drowninginmyworries/pseuds/drowninginmyworries
Summary: 'He is hers, and she is his, and soon they’re going to have someone who is theirs. 50% him, 50% her, and 100% love.'orWith fatherhood imminent, Jake reflects.
Relationships: Jake Peralta/Amy Santiago
Comments: 8
Kudos: 49





	midnight interlude

**Author's Note:**

> Unbeta'd, because this was written in 3 AM haste and is more of an emotional release than anything else.

Amy’s stretched out against him with her face buried in his neck, her nose squished against him. She’s clutching him tightly, even in sleep, like she’s trying to keep him anchored to her always. 

Maybe she does it because she’s always cognizant of all the time they’ve already lost. 

Jake tries not to think about that too much. Especially when they still have so much time ahead of them; he’s ever-reminded by the swell of Amy’s stomach, getting the tiniest bit bigger each day. 

Their baby’s growing every single day, and he’s sure his heart is too, bursting at the seams and overflowing like a big gooey fountain of love. It’s kind of disgusting.

Or at least, that’s what he would’ve said seven years ago, before he owned up to his emotions, to _himself_ , to what he owed other people. 

But that was then, and right now, he’s so stupidly happy, so ridiculously in love that every second feels like a treasure. Even that time when she was so sick she made herself cry, and he had to field her nausea, her tears, and his own overwhelming emotions all at once. 

Even then, he’d still felt like the luckiest man in the world because he got to do it with _her_. 

He is hers, and she is his, and soon they’re going to have someone who is _theirs_. 50% him, 50% her, and 100% love. 

The full force of that knowledge crashes into him like a tidal wave, and not for the first time, he swallows the responding lump in his throat, holds Amy a little bit tighter, and fights the stinging behind his eyes. 

God, he’s such a sap. 

Even though all the cells in his body feel like they’re going to burst, he’s still afraid. It’s less overwhelming now though, more of a tiny ever-present ache than something all encompassing. 

He can’t _not_ be afraid. He’s carried so much hurt in his heart for so long, and even now, when he closes his eyes he can still see his father walking away from him, his mom standing at his side with trembling hands. 

It’s not always his father, though. 

Sometimes it’s one of the Iannuccis shooting someone at point blank range, so close to him the blood spatters over his clothes. Other times it’s Hotysman pulling a gun on him, or Figgis holding him hostage, or the jury sentencing him. Sometimes, it’s just the cold prison walls around him as the room grows smaller, smaller, smaller. 

For as much joy their baby’s already brought into his life, he knows the world doesn’t care. The world is horrible and unforgiving, and he knows that to be true because he _lived_ it. 

He stares at the ceiling in silence for a little while, his chest feeling tight with a maelstrom of emotion, when Amy suddenly snores particularly loudly, her mouth wide open as she drools all over his shirt. 

Like popping a bubble, all the pressure in his chest unfurls, and he chuckles quietly as he wipes the side of her mouth with his thumb. She nuzzles even closer to him when she feels his touch, seeking him out in her slumber. 

And then his eyes are stinging again, only he doesn’t have pregnancy hormones to blame. Not that he could ever bring himself to blame anything though, because there is _nothing_ shameful about loving Amy Santiago this hard. 

He is hers, and she is his, and soon they will have someone who is wholly _theirs_. 

The world can be a bad place. Sometimes it’s unforgiving, and dark, and depressing, and painfully merciless even at the best of times.

The thing is, his universe focused down to one singular point the moment she tossed a handful of peanuts in the air with a proud grin on her face, even if he didn’t know it then. His universe is strong and brave and unwavering, and a know-it-all, and a _complete_ dork. 

Most of all, his universe is _beautiful_. 

And now, his universe is growing, and even though there’s fear, there’s also warmth settling deep in his bones. And he knows there’s nothing the world will ever be able to do to make him feel cold ever again. 


End file.
